Indoor Campout

If you have never had  an indoor camp out, I highly recommend it!  I decided to have  an impromptu camping trip for my daughters and it was truly a huge success.  So here are the 5 easy steps to your own indoor camp out.

1. Create a tent.  If you don't have a tent or have one but don't want to bother getting it out and setting it up, you move all your kids furniture to the side in their room.  Take a large sheet and drape it over the backs of dining room chairs, using rubber bands to tie on.  Take a comforter or large blanket and spread it out underneath the tent with pillows.

2. Make sure your kids are properly packed for their camping trip, in our case the essentials were a stuffed animal, a book and a pair of  pajamas.  You notice that they already put their backpacks in their tent.
 
3. Gather all the required nutritional items which of course means hot dogs, hot dog buns, ketchup, mustard, relish, graham crackers, marshmallows and chocolate bars.

4. Use your wonderful fireplace as your campfire.  If you don't have a fireplace, you could use a burner on your stove if you have a gas  stove, if you have no gas stove, you could use your microwave and just pretend. Roast your hot dogs, make s'mores and don't forget to sing a few camp songs.

5.  Last but not least, you should play a game or two, use a flashlight and if your kids are old  enough, tell spooky stories.  We played Go Fish in front of the fire, then changed into our pajamas and climbed into our tent to read a book by flashlight.

I guess there is technically another step.

6.  Marvel at your awesomeness as you watch your kids faces light up with joy when you set everything up.  Be amazed that they like it so much they continually talk about their camp out for the next week, ask to sleep in their tent every night and want to make every dinner in the fireplace.  Smile  at your husband as you both realize you have just made one of those amazing memories for them that they will cherish even as adults.

Hero

I think everyone should have a hero, someone they look up to and admire, someone they can turn to for guidance, someone they actually KNOW, not someone famous.  In regards to that, I have to tell you, I think I have discovered who my monster's hero is, at least for the moment. 
Today, our television quit working and the first thing my 2 year old said was, "Maybe Papa can fix it!"  (Papa is my dad, her grandfather)  A few weeks ago she pulled a drawer out too far and it fell off the tracks, her response?  "Uh oh, Papa needs to come fix it!" 
The best one though is that her birthday is in a few months and when I asked her what kind of party she wanted for her birthday, she immediately responded with "A princess party!!!" and then followed that up almost immediately with "and Papa has to dress like a prince!!"
You don't think she likes her Papa do you? 
Of course, if I had to name just one person as my hero, it would be my father as well.  He is the kindest, most generous, most selfless person I know.  He is always giving to others, hence becoming a police officer.  He lives to protect and serve, and not just in a professional sense but truly in a personal sense as well.  He uses his time off to help me and my brother remodel our houses, or help mow an elderly person's lawn or construct a handicap ramp for someone's home.  He takes vacation time every year to go with a group called Church Builders of Texas to build a church.  If you call him and need help, he will be there at the drop of a hat and not just with his family, but with anyone he knows.  Please don't take this to mean he is flawless.  He is human of course and he makes many mistakes, just like all of us do, but I don't think I have ever seen my dad do anything malicious or cold hearted, he always strives to be a good, Godly man.  So to my dad, should you ever discover my blog, thank you for being my hero, the person I look up to and admire, the person I strive to become more like every day. 
I love you Dad!

5 Reasons I Am A Horrible Parent

I realized as I was putting up all the presents my children got for Christmas that, by many peoples standards, I would be considered a horrible parent.  Here are the main reasons I came up with.

1. I don't allow unsupervised access to art supplies or board games.
           I have a shelf high up in the play room where all the coloring books, crayons, pencils, paints and board games sit.  Why you might ask?  Well, because small parts of board games get lost, swallowed or destroyed.  Coloring books get ripped up, crayons get ground into the carpet or colored all over my walls and the play room gets even more destroyed than normal.  Mostly because I value my sanity.  My children are allowed to play with all of these things, but the rule is the playroom has to be clean before I will get it down and I supervise them.  Cruel I know.

2. No cable television.
           That is right!  We have no cable or satellite television so my poor children never get to see the Disney channel or Nickelodeon or whatever other children's channels there are.  There are a few reasons for this.  One is that it is a colossal waste of money.  Why anyone pays for extra channels is beyond me.  Secondly, I don't want or need to sit around and watch television that often.  I also don't want my children sitting around soaking up constant junk on television.  We do have the local channels and they do get to watch some  PBS shows which they enjoy.  Besides, they get to see cable shows when they are at the grandparents house as a special treat. 

3.  Extremely limited video game and computer time.
         We have a Wii that was given to us as a gift a few years ago, and I can count the number of hours my children have actually played on it on one hand.  The same holds true with the internet and computers in general.  They also aren't allowed to play with my smartphone.  It isn't that I have anything against all these technologically fun things, it is just that I believe that, especially while children are young, they should be using their imagination to come up with fun things to do, not being stunted by expecting some electronic device to provide amusement.  When they get older, I will have no problem with letting them play on these things but I want them to first learn to use their imagination.

4. No unlimited access to books.
          What?!?!?!   Someone who doesn't like their children spending all day interacting with technology doesn't let them play with books all the time?  I want my children to learn that books are special and we treat them with respect.  We don't tear them up or color on the pages.  We almost always read a book when they ask.  I say almost because if they are supposed to be cleaning up the play room or they are in time out, they don't get to read a book.  I don't, however, have the books out where they can get to them all the time.  We used to have the books out and one too many destroyed books made me believe it wasn't a good idea.  It is amazing how quickly a child can destroy something while you are changing a siblings diaper, going to the restroom, checking the mail or cooking dinner.

5. No juice.
          Well, not really no juice, but juice is treated like a soda in our house.  It is a special treat that you only get every once in a while.  Why?  Because juice is not as nutritional as fresh fruit, it fills them up on empty calories and it can cause cavities.  So my children drink water all day.  They get one glass of milk a day and every once in a while they get to have a small glass of juice which is normally half juice, half water.  I am trying to teach my children that if they are thirsty, they need to drink water.  I don't pretend to be an expert but I do think part of the obesity problem in our society has to do with the fact that people constantly must drink something with flavor (and therefore calories.)

So there you have it.  Do you agree or disagree?  Tell me, what do you do that makes you a horrible parent? 

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year everyone! 
The coolest part about my girls getting older is that they are starting to get really excited about holidays and they look forward to them.  They couldn't wait for Thanksgiving and all the people to come over and then, like pretty much every kid, they were REALLY excited about Christmas.
Of course, you blink and then it is New Years.  We always let our kids be up for the ball drop, we have done it since our first was born.  Of course we don't let them stay up until the ball drops, they go to bed at their normal time and we wake them up about 11:30 and have tasty snacks and sparkling cider while we watch the ball drop and then they go back to bed.  This year it took about 2 hours for them to fall back asleep but at least they slept later on New  Years Day.
Since I live in the South, I grew up eating black eyed peas on New Years Day but my Mom never made a  special dish, she would just heat up a can of  black eyed peas and we would have it as a side dish.  I had never even heard of Hoppin John until I came across it a few months ago on another blog.  It sounded awesome so I decided I would make that on New Years.  As I started searching for the best recipe I noticed that Hoppin John seemed kind of  like Chili in that there are a few things it has to contain to be considered Hoppin John but beyond that, everyone kind of has their own recipe.
Instead of following someone elses recipe, I just made my own.  I only had canned black eyed peas in my pantry and I used brown rice instead  of white but it tasted really good!  Mr. Gem and myself both really liked it as did a friend of ours who was over visiting.  Without further adieu, here is my own recipe for Hoppin John.

Hoppin John

6 strips of bacon
2  or 3 bunches of  green onions
6 cloves garlic
2 cans black eyed peas, drained
4 cups cooked brown rice
salt and  pepper to taste

Use a deep sauté pan and first cook the bacon.  While the bacon is cooking, chop up the green onions and garlic.  Pull the bacon off and set on paper towels to allow it to drain.  Leave the drippings in the pan and toss in the onions and garlic.  Sauté for a few minutes or until soft then add your black eyed peas and rice.  Cook for several minutes using salt and pepper to adjust the flavor until it is warmed all the way through.  Crumble bacon and sprinkle on top and eat! 
Surprisingly satisfying and lucky too!  On a side note, isn't that serving dish it is in awesome?  I got that as a Christmas present and of course, I just had to use it.
I hope you remembered to eat your black eyed peas and lets all have a wonderful lucky year!

Out of the mouths of babes

Every once in a while, your child will say or do something so profound, you can't help but stop and smile at how much they have grown or how their mind works.
The other day my 4 year old decided to gather my various large decorations and place them all under the Christmas tree.  She fiddled around with them for a while and then stood back and said, "there is 5, NOW they are a family!!" 

The 5 Best Things About Parenting One Gender

As promised last week in this post, here are 5 of the most awesome things about parenting the same gender.

1. You know what to expect.  Changing a diaper on a boy? Yeah, you already know how to deal with that.  A girl getting her first period?  Yeah, you got that.  Anything that is uniquely gender dependent, you have already dealt with or will deal with on the first one.

2. Hand me downs!  We have not had to buy any clothes yet and my oldest is 4 years old.  Don't get me wrong, we definitely HAVE purchased clothes for them but we haven't HAD to.  Everyone was so excited when our first was born that we were flooded with so many clothes, she didn't even get to wear all of them before she would outgrow them.  Thanks to parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and friends, the girls get new clothes on Christmas, their birthday or just because and every article of clothing my Monkey has outgrown, has moved directly to my Monster's closet and when Monster outgrows it, it goes to my Munchkin.

3. Shared space.  While I would love for each of my children to have their own bedroom, they could all share one room if necessary and it wouldn't be a problem.  Children of opposite genders can share when they are small but it becomes awkward and not very practical as they reach puberty.  Bath time is also easy and even as they get older, it won't be a problem.  If Monster is taking a shower and Monkey needs to get ready, she can go in and use the sink.  As a teenage girl, I was left banging on the door waiting for my brother to get out of the bathroom so I could get ready.

4. Instant, lifelong friends!  There is an amazing bond that develops between sisters (and brothers), having someone there who is in the trenches with you, going through all the same difficult changes that come from growing up, that knows everything about you, and my daughters get to experience that.  Don't get me wrong, I love my brother to death, but I always wondered what it would be like to have a sister.  Mr. Gem only has a sister, so he always wondered what it would be like to have a brother and when we found out Monster was going to be a girl, we both got so excited that our girls were getting something we always wanted!

5.  No opposite gender kids in the house!  One thing I am really excited about in having all girls is that when they are teenagers, I don't have to worry about their brother's friends always wanting to stay the night to be near the cute girls.  I could easily see it the other way too.  All the girls wanting to stay so they could flirt etc. with the brothers.


There are so many wonderful facets in having all one gender.  My husband, in having all girls, gets to be absolutely adored by 4 girls and if we had all boys, I would be the Queen to 4 guys.  My husband never has to worry about the girls raiding his closet and if I had all boys, I would never have to worry about going in my room to find my favorite pair of red heels missing (sadly, my 2 year old is already a closet raider!) I can't help but think if we had a boy, he probably would NOT like having to be dragged around shopping, or going to his sisters gymnastics competition and if we had all boys and one girl, she probably would NOT like having to be dragged around to his sports or having him and his friends pick on her (I know I didn't like it).  So to those wondering, no, we DON'T regret not having a boy just like my friends with boys DON'T regret not having a girl.

EDITED TO ADD: I just remembered one other awesome thing about having all one gender!  When you are frazzle brained and the kids are being crazy, you don't have to remember names!  Just say "GIRLS, STOP IT!!!"  As I just did right after I published the original post! 

Parenting the Same Gender

Yesterday while I was out shopping, I ran into an acquaintance I hadn't seen in a while who has 3 boys.  While we were catching up, we started talking about the various comments we have both heard regarding having all one gender and how infuriating they are.
So, for those who might be wondering, here are 5 things you should never say to someone parenting all one gender, unless of course you really don't like them and you simply want to piss them off.

*for simplicity sake, I will write these from my perspective but feel free to substitute boy, girl, husband, wife, etc. as appropriate*

1. While they are pregnant- So are you hoping for a boy? or Maybe you will get lucky and have a boy this time!
 I always answered this question with, "yeah or maybe I will get lucky and have a girl!"

2. Oh your poor husband, stuck in a house full of girls.  I wonder what he did to deserve that!
Ummm, obviously he did something right to be BLESSED with having 3 wonderful girls who completely adore him.

3. So are you going to try again for a boy?
 Oh, because apparently a family isn't "complete" until you have at least one of each. 

4. I feel sorry for you! or I couldn't do it!
Okay, why?  What is so terribly wrong with having all your children be the same gender?  When did our society get this crazy idea in their heads that you have to have both?

5. We want to have 3 kids, but if we have 2 girls we are stopping there.  We don't want to risk having 3 girls.
Do you have even the remotest idea of precisely how offensive that remark is to me, a mother to 3 wonderful little girls?  As my friend said, "This isn't Burger King!  You don't get to have it your way!" 


The underlying theme and feeling that we, as parents of same gender children, get when you make comments like this is that there is something wrong with one of my children.  I especially hate it when people make these remarks in front of my children.  Mr. Gem and I didn't find out what Munchkin was until the delivery room so I constantly got asked, while out with my daughters, what I was having and when I would say I don't know people would ALWAYS remark with number 1 up there.  All I could think was, "how would I feel if I were standing here and someone asked my mom that question?" and my answer was always invariably, "well, I would feel like there was something wrong with me or something wrong with being a girl since everyone is saying mom and dad should have a boy.  Should I have been a boy?  Would things be better if I were?"

Now I am sure it would be easy to write off those feelings as being pregnant and hormonal except that I have felt and still do feel that way even when I am not pregnant and the other parents of same gender children that I know share the sentiment.  I realize that people just don't think about it and they certainly aren't trying to be cruel when they make these comments but it doesn't take away the fact that you are suggesting or implying, many times to my children's faces, that something is wrong with them, especially the youngest because obviously, mom and dad were "trying for a boy" when they conceived you and you didn't come out right.

Do we sometimes wonder what it would be like to have one of the other gender?  Of course we do, but that doesn't mean we would trade what we have for the world.  I wonder what it would be like to be royalty as well but if someone came tomorrow and offered me the chance to join the royal family I wouldn't even dream about taking it.  I love my life, I love my kids and I am blessed beyond all measure to have what I have.
 
I will do another post in a few days (here it is) highlighting the best things about having all one gender.  So tell me, if you have all one gender, what are the worst comments you have heard about it?

Courageous the Movie

First let me start off by apologizing to all (2) of my rabid readers for not posting in a few days.  My Monster got sick with a stomach bug and just as she was getting over it, my Monkey got it too. 

So I went and saw Courageous tonight.  My father saw it last week and he really wanted to take Mr. Gem and I to see it as well.  Let me start out by saying that both of us do NOT like watching movies like this.  My husband puts it much better than I do when he states that he doesn't like to be emotionally manipulated.  I should also state that my father is a police officer which meant that this film had an extra resonance with me.  I am not going to write a full review here but I will hit on some particular points in the film which highlight why I don't watch films like this.

****WARNING SPOILERS AHEAD****

The movie starts out with a man pulling into a gas station and pumping gas.  He steps away from his truck for just a moment to grab something to clean his windshield and someone runs up, jumps in his truck and takes off.  He chases after them on foot, grabs onto the side of the truck and as the car jacker is driving, he is holding onto the window and trying to push and shove the thief out of the way.  The truck swerves, he falls, the truck hits a tree, the thief runs off and as witnesses are calling 911, he is trying to crawl to his truck.  The witnesses are telling him not to worry about the vehicle and he says he isn't at which point he reaches the back door, opens it and we see his infant son in a car seat in the back. 
*Wow, a sucker punch to the gut and we aren't even 5 minutes into the film yet.*

We are then introduced to the other main characters and get a little bit of back story on them and then, WHAM!  The 9 year old daughter of the main character Adam is killed in a car wreck with a drunk driver. *Yeah, my gut was just starting to feel better, thanks for that swift kick!*

Six weeks later, dad Adam is wrestling with anger, guilt and all the other emotions one would expect from someone who tragically loses a child and he decides he needs to make a resolution to be a better father to his surviving son.  Things seem to be going well then one night over dinner, son starts crying and says he wishes he had been a better brother.
*If they keep this up, I'm going to have a permanent bruise on my stomach here!*

Promptly after this, Adam goes to a parking lot he had previously been at with deceased daughter.  When there the first time, she asked him to dance with her and he said no and instead he watched her dance.  Now he gets out, puts in CD of the same song and dances by himself while we see flashbacks of her then asks God to tell her that he did his part of the dance.
*Seriously?!?!?!  Why don't I just put my heart on a platter and give it to you, you are certainly yanking the strings hard enough!*

One of the last scenes in the film is 2 of the other main characters pulling over a vehicle.  Drug dealers are in the vehicle along with 2 kilos in the trunk.  The driver decides he isn't going back to jail and he tries to shoot the cop.
*Thanks, that isn't emotional for me or anything considering it has been a recurring nightmare since I was a small child*

Thankfully, the teenager in the backseat recognizes the officer as the dad of a girl he wants to date, decides they can't kill them, grabs the gun and prevents the officer from getting hit when it goes off.  A big shoot out ensues, the bad guys run out of bullets, notice a young girl down the street watching them, decide to take her hostage and run after her.  Two officers give chase, including Adam, the one who lost his daughter earlier, and after a climatic fight scene, they manage to wrestle the 2 bad guys to the ground but not before Adam gets the crap beat out of him.  As he is laying there, he asks about the girl and they tell him she is safe and with her father.

**Wow, so in one film they have managed to address the fear of my baby getting kidnapped during a carjacking, my daughter being killed by a drunk driver, my father being murdered while trying to protect and serve, a sibling AND a parent dealing with survivor guilt and my child being taken hostage, Woohoo!  What a fun night at the movies!!!**


In all seriousness, the film does have a powerful message and it does a good job of conveying it but it just isn't for me.  I spent most of the film sitting in my chair clenching my muscles.  I kept trying to relax but then another tragedy would happen which would cause me to tense up again.  By the time we left the theater, I had a stress headache from all the emotional torment.  I understand why my father wanted to take us to see this film and I am really touched because my dad has never invited us to a movie.  He isn't the best at verbalizing what he is thinking and feeling and this was his way of conveying what he wanted to and, knowing that, I am deeply moved.  However, next time I will have to simply politely decline unless it is a comedy, sci-fi or romance. 
As the Ancient Greeks said, Know Thyself.

Snow?!?!?!?!?!?!

I can't believe it.  After the insanely hot summer we have had, I woke up this morning and looked outside to see snow!

Time to put on the house shoes...

and light a fire!

I almost wish I needed to get out so I could finally wear the awesome coat I bought about a month ago.  Check this out and tell me that it isn't going to be awesome when it is freezing outside!

It is a floor length, black leather coat from Express and I got it at a thrift store for 16.00!! Oh well, there will be plenty of other opportunities to wear it.
As for today, I think I am going to make some pumpkin muffins and curl up with the kids in front of the fire.  I will post the recipe later.

Facebook Dilemma

I should have known better.  I am fiercely protective of not only my privacy but also my children's.  It is the reason why you will never see a picture of my or my children's faces on this site.  It is also the reason I use pseudonyms for myself and my family.  Anyone that knows me in real life and comes across this blog will immediately know it is me but acquaintances and strangers will not be able to identify me or my family. 

My brother, whom I love dearly, does not seem to understand this.  He continues to post pictures of my children, along with their names to his Facebook profile.  I have asked him repeatedly to stop.  When I take a cute picture and he asks me to send it to him, I ask if he will post it on Facebook and when he says yes, I refuse to send it.  Every time I try to talk to him about it he rolls his eyes and says it is no big deal. 
I know he is extremely proud of his nieces, heck he is their godfather and should anything ever happen to my husband and I he will become their guardian, but I don't want 300 of his closest friends, co-workers and extended family members who I purposefully have no contact with to see my children's pictures or know their names or birth dates.  I hate running into mutual acquaintances and having them tell me how much they love that cute picture that their uncle posted up. 
So imagine my (non)surprise when I sent him an adorable picture of my girls all cuddling together in my bed and 5 hours later it appeared on Facebook along with "likes" from those very same family members whom I have no contact with.  I should have known better.  I shouldn't have sent the picture but it was early in the morning, I was sleepy and frankly, I forgot about his obsession with posting my children all over his Facebook site. 
What do I do about it?  I don't want to cause a rift in the family, I love my brother dearly and I don't want to cut him out of their lives but at the same time I am NOT comfortable with complete strangers or family I have no contact with knowing my children's names, ages, birth dates and what they look like. 
Does anyone out there have a suggestion for how to handle this?  I know I could probably go the legal route and report the photos to Facebook and they would be taken down but it would upset my brother.  How can I make him understand that it isn't his place to post pictures of MY children?  How can I make him understand that I don't want my children to have a digital footprint right now?  All of my friends ask my permission before posting anything to do with my children and on occasion I have given permission such as when my 2 older girls were flower girls in a friends wedding and she wanted to post her wedding pics on her profile.  I gave her permission but asked that she please only put their first names on the pictures.  Why can my parents understand this, my childless friends understand this, but my (also childless) brother can't?  How can I word it so he will finally get the point?

Sprained ankle.....and Cake!!!!!

My Monkey and I are enrolled in a Mommy and Me gymnastics class at the local college.  On Saturday, I was walking across the tumble mat when I stepped wrong and twisted my ankle.  It hurt a bit but by the end of class I couldn't feel it anymore so I forgot about it.  I only remembered when, a few hours later, I squatted down to help my Monster get dressed and I had a sharp throbbing pain shoot through my ankle after which my ankle ballooned up and I couldn't walk on it.  Joy of joys!  A lovely sprain. 
Of course, said sprain would happen and start hurting about 5 minutes before I had all of my family come over to celebrate my Dad's birthday.  At least everyone enjoyed themselves, even if I was confined to a chair.  My husband smoked some ribs for about 8 hours, these are the leftovers after 6 adults and 2 kids had their fill!

I made a cake for my Dad.  His request was chocolate.  I came up with this cake a few years ago but I still can't think of a name for it, my brother says I should just call it Awesome.  If anyone has any better suggestions, I would love to hear them.

Ingredients:

1 box chocolate cake mix (I have done it with chocolate cake from scratch but for simplicity sake, just buy the mix)
1 jar caramel topping
1 8oz cream cheese
1 8 oz container whipped topping, thawed
1 cup powdered sugar
8 snack size Butterfinger candy bars

Bake your cake according to the directions.  As soon as it comes out of the oven, take the handle of a wooden spoon and poke holes all over the cake.  Also take your cream cheese out and set it on the counter to soften.

Open your jar of caramel topping and pour it all over the cake, making sure it gets in all the holes as well.  It is important to do this as soon as it comes out of the oven while the cake is still hot so the caramel will melt into the cake.

Now you need to let the cake cool for a bit.  After the cake has cooled for 20-30 minutes and your cream cheese has softened, it is time to make the frosting.
Put your cream cheese in a bowl along with the cup of powdered sugar.

Beat on medium speed until the cream cheese is sufficiently whipped.

Once it is completely mixed together and smooth, add your whipped topping.

This is another important step.  You want to fold the whipped topping into the cream cheese.  Don't use the mixer for this and don't over stir. You want to end up with a texture and consistency like this.

Now you can take your frosting and put it on your cake.

You either have the choice of spreading it out evenly, or you can surreptitiously pile extra frosting in one corner and make sure you get that piece!  Since this cake was my Dad's birthday cake, I spread it evenly.

Now, you take your Butterfinger's...

start chopping them up....

until you have them all coarsely chopped.

Sprinkle them on top of your cake and Voila!!!

Your super tasty awesome cake is ready!  Make sure you store this cake in the refrigerator since the frosting is made with cream cheese and whipped topping.  I have never calculated what a calorie bomb this cake is and honestly, I don't want to know!  I only make it on my birthday or other special occasions so why not live a little, right?

Old Racist

                                            I'm not racist honey!

                               Is that a colored person on the television????



I have a conundrum.  I have recently discovered that my husband's sweet 99 year old Grandma is a racist.  I know it isn't that surprising given her age but it still comes as somewhat of a shock to me since in the 9 years I have known her, she has never once shown any racist tendencies.  Obviously, she was the whole time and now that she is suffering from age related dementia, her internal filter has been turned off and she says and does things which are questionable at best.
She can't be left alone anymore so my in-laws moved in with her and sometimes, when they need to run errands, I come and babysit Grandma for them.  It was on just such an occasion the other day when she saw an inter-racial couple on television and made the comment that she just doesn't agree with "colored men" marrying white women.  I was kind of blown back and didn't know what to say at first.  It was one of those moments when a million things run through your head in about .5 seconds, some of which were
1. I can't believe she just said that!
2. Do I say something or just let it go?
3. If my children were older I might be able to let it go and explain later but they aren't, they are 4 and 2 which means they are at an impressionable age where they are always watching adults around them.
4. If I try to say something, am I going to make the situation worse, arguing with a senile old woman?
5. If I say nothing, are my children going to get the impression that it is okay to not confront racism when they see it or worse, think it is acceptable to hold beliefs like that?

So I decided in those .5 seconds that I should say something so my children would see first hand that I am not complicit with Grandma's views and that there is a way to casually confront without arguing.  So my response was, "Oh yeah, why is that?"  At which point Grandma just kind of laughed and said she just didn't think it was right.  So I responded, "Well, times are different and there is nothing wrong with it.  People are just people, it doesn't matter what color your skin is."  At which point she laughed again, what I call the senile laugh.  A kind of condescending, bewildered laugh all rolled into one and then she drifted back into her own thoughts.
I have really struggled with that situation for the past several days.  Did I say the right thing?  Should I have said something more or said it differently?  What do I do if (when) something like it happens again?  How do I make sure that I set a good example for my children about confronting wrongs, minimize their exposure to negative ideas while at the same time not sheltering them because they will have to face it at some point? 

A big thank you to Ambro and FreeDigitalPhotos.net for the picture of the elderly woman.

Who I Am

I am a fairly normal Southern gal, I think.  I like to dress up but I am also equally comfortable in a pair of beat up jeans and a t-shirt.  I like to cook and create new dishes, I can shoot a gun and fix my car but I still get weird looks when I go in the automotive store in my heels with my nails done to pick up a new fuel pump.  I named my blog Texas Gem because I, like almost every other Southern gal I know, love anything that sparkles, glitters or shines.
I am a SAHM to 3 wonderful little girls, a 4 year old who will from here on out be referred to as Monkey, a 2 1/2 year old who is Monster and a 4 month old named Munchkin.  While I love my children dearly, I sometimes feel bored out of my mind with the monotony of it all and the lack of adult interaction.  It doesn't help that all of my nearest and dearest friends do not have children yet and I have never really been into the whole mommy playgroups.  I don't want to make friends solely based on the fact that we both have children, I would rather have some adult interests connecting us.  Basically, none of my friends are at the same point in their life and the other moms I have met aren't at the same point either since they are all working moms.  I love my family and feel very grateful that I have the opportunity to stay home and raise my children but sometimes I want more.  Is that wrong?  I think about getting a job just to have something to do but then I look at what I have gotten to experience with my 2 older girls and realize that I don't want to miss those moments with my youngest and I don't want her to miss those moments with me either.  They don't stay little for long and I know that in the blink of an eye, they will all be in school and on their way to growing up and I don't ever want to regret not being here for them.  So tell me, if anyone out there reads this, am I the only one?